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UNICEF published a report last February showing that, compared with the rest of the developed world, children in the UK for example have the poorest relationships with their family and friends and lower well-being.

They are also more prone to behaviour such as underage sex and getting drunk. We are the only country covered by the UNICEF report where less than half of children find their peers kind and helpful, and four in 10 of our youngsters have had sex by the age of 15.

The right way forward is to understand what has gone wrong and to deal with it in a more comprehensive manner. The last thing parents need is more advice from the government about how to raise their children. The majority of parents are doing their best, spending more time with their children than ever before. Today, they spend on average 99 minutes a day with their children, compared with 25 minutes a day in 1975. But, thanks to the proliferation of good parenting guides, parents feel more pressure than ever before to prove they are doing the right thing to bring up their children.

My concern is not with parents or schools, but with the space in between. One of the central reasons why children are so unhappy is that the space to simply be a child has deteriorated. Children need outdoor space to play and explore to keep physically active, develop social skills and achieve mental well-being. But the public space we leave for children is often not safe and appealing. Crime, bullying and traffic are all real and growing dangers.

Between 1998/99 and 2005/06, the number of injuries resulting from gun crime increased by 342 percent, and 43 percent of gangs say they hang around playgrounds. Similarly, 50 percent of bullying takes place outside school. And over-regulated playgrounds, providing no real challenge to children, mean cyberspace rather than public space is the preferred choice.

So our children have retreated from public space. Only two in 10 children play out in the streets and spaces near where they live, compared with eight in 10 a generation ago. This most affects those from the poorest families, since it is they who are most reliant on public space for play and recreation.

A recent study showed that 32 percent of children from the most deprived areas are watching television every Sunday afternoon, compared with 7 percent of those from the most affluent areas. A lack of good, quality public space to play is opening up a new social divide, as softer, non-cognitive skills acquired in the playground are much more important for success in a service-based economy.

Instead of lecturing parents, I want to help them by creating more child-friendly public spaces. In those countries that performed well in the UNICEF league table, children were seen and heard whether it be in restaurants or parks. To make spaces safer, adult supervision is needed. That means more police officers on the streets rather than in the office, street stewards who can stop bullying and parents who coordinate walking buses to schools.

For children to participate in outdoor activity, adults need to be more involved to ensure safe and exciting experiences. Outdoor trips, however, are in decline because teachers and volunteers fear mischievous litigation if children have accidents. This is why I believe we need to change the law to ensure that teachers and volunteers feel confident about organising trips, safe in the knowledge they would only be liable for accidents if they behaved recklessly.

Children's happiness is also affected by the quality of their relationships, which is why intra- and inter-generational relationships need to be strengthened.

Recognising in law the right of children from broken homes to be looked after by grandparents would be a step forward in strengthening the ties between the generations. And giving headteachers the ultimate power to expel pupils who persistently bully would help reduce the damaging effects of bullying on peer-to-peer relations. Providing more activities where children of different ages mix would, research confirms, be another positive change.

We need to use this evidence to develop a framework for implementing policies that make Britain the most child-friendly society in the developed world. The main tasks, I believe, are to create spaces for children to play safely, and to improve their relationships with their peers and elders.

Ask twenty people the question above, and you would probably get twenty different responses – and offered readily. It seems everyone is an expert when it comes to saying what is wrong with education, and what should be done about it. But I have spent the last 30 years doing research with teachers in schools, and by the nature of my job I have also had to keep up with what other educational researchers have been doing. And so I know that hard evidence from research on one ubiquitous aspect of school life – classroom talk – now adds up to make a very strong case for it to be given special attention by policy makers and practitioners.

Talk is undervalued

Talk is ephemeral – here one instant, gone the next, which is probably why it has not been taken seriously enough. But it is at the heart of education. Teachers use talk as the main tool of their trade. The amount and quality of talk that children experience in the early years is a good predictor of how well they will do in school. Yet teachers’ effective use of talk isn’t a high profile topic – and schools aren’t doing enough to develop children’s skills in using it. We know that most classroom talk looks like it always has done: teachers asking "closed" questions to try to prompt specific ‘right answers’ from children. Yet we also know children get most enthusiastically involved in their education and learn best from it, when teachers do the following things:

1. use some "open" questions which explore students’ ideas

2. encourage students to put knowledge into their own words (while also offering new vocabulary to accommodate new ideas)

3. press the students to elaborate and justify their views, e.g. "How did you know that?" "Why?".

4. allow students extended turns to express their thoughts and reveal their misunderstandings

5. hold back demonstrations or explanations until the ideas of some students have been heard (so that explanations can be linked what has been said and to issues they have raised).

6. use whole class discussion to help students see where their study of a topic is coming from and where it is going

7. at least sometimes, allow students’ comments to shift the direction of a discussion (and even, perhaps, of a lesson!)

8. "model’ ways of using language to present rational arguments, so that students can learn by example.  

Talking skills - for teachers and pupils 

As any teacher will testify, though, if you try asking open questions, or waiting for extended answers with a class who have had only a very traditional experience of talk you will probably only hear (at best) a suspicious silence. It all depends on a teacher establishing the right classroom climate for talk, and that takes time and skill. Some teachers are naturally brilliant at doing this. Their students come to appreciate the educational value of talk themselves, and trust that they will not look foolish in front of their teacher and fellow students if they express tentative ideas or reasonable disagreements. But research has found that most teachers aren’t making the best use of talk. They need some help in making classroom talk can work for them and their students. The Training and Development Agency's (TDA) "Professional Standards for Teachers" say that a teacher should "adapt their language to suit the learners they teach, introducing new ideas and concepts clearly, and using explanations, questions, discussions and plenaries effectively". But it is not just a matter of "adaptation" - a critical review of established habits and the learning of some new ones is often required. The TDA might more appropriately say that a teacher should "be skilled in using talk to instruct, guide, manage, assess and inspire a class of children, and in so doing enable them to become effective users of talk for learning, explaining and solving problems together."  

Learning how to discuss 

When it comes to children’s own developing use of spoken language in the classroom, the evidence is also there – though the research reveals an interesting paradox. Collaborative group work can be a powerful aid to learning, in all subjects, and for the development of reasoning and communication skills; but in most classrooms, most of the time, it is quite unproductive, even a waste of time. A possible solution to this paradox is, fortunately, quite obvious: many children, perhaps most, need to be taught how to talk and work together. Just giving children opportunity to collaborate isn’t good enough – they need guidance. International research has shown that when children are helped to understand talk as a problem-solving and learning tool, and given guidance in developing skills in using it, the quality of their talk and group work improves and so do the individual learning outcomes. For children whose out-of-school lives give them little exposure to reasoned discussion, this can be a life-changing experience.

Proposal: a national education initiative

It is accepted that children need to be taught skills in maths, science, football, cookery and IT, so why not talk? After every policy review and revamp, the "basics" are always still just literacy and numeracy. Is it really more important that children know about trigonometry by the age of 15 than that they are able to communicate well with other people? We sometimes here concerns expressed about how children speak, but these are usually focused on the "red herrings" of accents and slang, which have nothing to do with what I am concerned with here.  Of course, British public schools have always valued confident expertise in the spoken word. Is that one reason why so many of their pupils end up in politics and the broadcast media? There are still a few misguided champions of the working classes who think that teaching children ways of communicating which they might not naturally encounter in their communities is oppressive. That is nonsense, of course, as I expect those people who have come from such backgrounds to achieve success in talk-based occupations would agree. My proposal for improving our schools is, then, as follows: let’s have a national educational initiative focused on talk, which would involve teachers, in all subjects, being trained to use effectively. And all primary teachers and secondary English teachers would also be asked to prioritise helping children learn how to use talk to get things done. We know now how to make this happen. 

Neil Mercer, Professor of Education at the University of Cambridge, took part in the seminar Curriculum and the Social Brain at the RSA